Travel Travails

Travelling for work is no fun at all. Especially with the Polar Vortex on the move across much of America. But sometimes just sometimes these travails takes you beyond the crowded airports, obnoxious co-passengers and taxi-cab woes. On my way to San Francisco from Dallas I got a chance to spend time with my boss who is usually a taciturn and mostly unavailable man. But then delayed flights, APPs exchanged, Starbucks and the ice was broken and me being me had to ask where was his accent from- didn't sound English or South African. And thus began a wonderful, exciting narrative going back to 1800s. So his aunt- his great-grandfather's younger sister was Mary Gaunt. She was the first "white" woman who travelled accross Africa and China. No mean feat in the days of Victorian Australia when women were meant to be kept barefoot and pregnant- of course it still happens in many parts of the world but I'm digressing. She was a published author and a woman of conviction. http://adb.anu.edu.au/biography/gaunt-mary-eliza-bakewell-6290 So now i have found my next read- "Alone in Africa" by Mary Gaunt. Not to be outdone by her grand Aunt, her neice who was a social butterfly met and married her husband solely on the strength of letters sent from Italy to North Africa where he was fighting Mussolini's war. In those Skypeless days she married her husband in-absentia in a little church in Italy and set sail for North Africa on an adventure which took her from the shores of Egypt to Ethiopia, Rhodesia before finnaly setting roots in South Africa! Women of substance and extra ordinary sense of adventure who did not have the comfort of airport lounges, heated cabs or Business class cabins and here I was bitching and moaning about a little dusting on my plane!

weights and measures

January is a time of new beginings and resolutions for most around the world and I'm no exception to this yearly ritual of a promise-to-turn-over-newleaf syndrome. As far as i can remember most of my resolutions revolve around food- I swear I'll measure what I eat and will for sure reduce my ever increasing reading on the scale. This year has been no different but has been exacerbated by the much anticipated 25 year college reunion which i just came back from. Fair or Foul the pressure is on us women to still look like the dewy selves we were at 20,keep the shame(!) waistlines and have black tresses cascade down our backs. so imagine what happens after 25 years- many batchmates I did not recognise but a greater many refused to recognise me. Back handed compliments flowed fast and furios accompanied by wonderment to "what happened to you"? Err..2 kids, surviving in a man's workplace, a dog and a husband all necessarily not in that order but pray do tell- "what is your excuse Mr. Pot Belly" ? Every meal and every drink was looked at with a jaundiced eye and yes many an admonition of "you don't need it". Excuse me, but who died and made you my dad? So I came back all chastened and determined to show em all that there might still be the the old girl of yore lurking under all those love handles. And the next reunion is 5 years away so I have plenty of time to get back. I've heard that 50 is now the new 35, so as I still have a few years to be 35 lookout all you gorgeous yummy mummies I'm hitting the trail with a vengence. After tomorrow and then Friday and maybe after Saturday's parties are done with. For tomorow is another day!

an equal place

It’s a fact that everyday when I get up the first thing I do is open my Facebook page and try to catch up with the 7 hours I missed while sleeping. Why do I do that? Is it an addiction? Yes, I am addicted. I’m addicted to knowing what has transpired in the lives of my friends in the other part of the world which was awake while I slept. For all my “friends” on FB are indeed my close friends. They are a reflection of my past, present and the times to come. Every day I look for something to move me, an uprising I can participate in and sometimes just an axe to grind J this morning a very simple article on Suchitra Sen’s resonated with me and I started to think on how a very small natural gesture has the power to change the world. It is a fact that in our society boys/men are valued over girls and this stems not just from the adage that “Boys will carry on the family name” but also from our scriptures which stress on how a person can attain salvation only if their last rites are performed by their male child. Millenniums of this belief cannot be erased by mere talk shows or panel discussions. It’s now embedded in ur DNA and I have seen many an enlightened parents of girls who in their last moments give in to societal norms and  their own insecurities and look for some male, however distantly related to give them the last farewell on their last journey. In that one instance the girl who was more than equal for her entire life gets relegated to being second. The only way to change is to be the change you want to see. Moon Moon Sen performed her mother’s last rites and it sent a very powerful signal that its ok to have your daughter bid you farewell and yes that you will go to heaven and attain Mokshya. Hopefully the gesture by a very revered and public figure will go a long way to chip away at this not-so-fair belief and girls will get the same honor and place as the sons. And I hope when the time comes my parents will accord me the same honor as I know for sure I will accord to my daughter.